And that statement actually has absolutely nothing to do with anything that I have to say tonight, but Lainey thought it rather humorous that I actually said this in conversation the other day when we were out on the Trail, and insisted that I put it up. So there.
So I'm sitting on my couch on a Sunday night, wishing I was actually tired enough to sleep, and dreaming of all the plans I have. Plans to finishing organizing my apartment and getting things just the way I like them. Plans of reading the ever-growing stacks of books by my bed. Plans of holiday parties that actually come to fruition instead of remaining ideas in my head. Plans of exploring my recently re-acquired fondness of crafting. Plans of traveling to see the world. Plans of being the best friend/daughter/sister/etc. I can be. And I'm realizing that for all my plans, I seem to be running around in circles an awful lot, never actually accomplishing much. And while I can blame in on this, that, or the other, it's really just a matter of how I choose to spend my time and on what I choose to focus my energy.
So. Where does this leave me? I've narrowed it down to a few realizations, two of which I shall mention here. First off, grad school. While a handful of you know this already, I am throwing this out there to general knowledge - I have no immediate plans to return to graduate school. "But Adrianne," you may say, "aren't you basically finished"? Yes and no. I have indeed finished all of my coursework and passed two of the three required exit exams. All that remains is to write and defend my thesis and pass the MuHi exit exam. It's a long story, but the short version is I'm not ready to put out any more effort for a degree that I will not use. I'm not permanently closing the door, but it is definitely on hold. And that is perfectly OK with me.
Second - Life, for all the busyness and drama and worries (and did I mention the busyness?), is actually grand. And I need to keep that in mind when I start to dwell on all the things I want to change. I can't fix everything/everyone at the same time. I need to step back and take things one step at a time.. and just see where God takes me from there. I see evidence that He is at work, and I can rest in knowing that He is working things for His purposes.
So there you have it. An update. A quasi-serious one, but an update nonetheless. And now, my pillow is calling, as tomorrow is Monday of what is sure to be a fast and furious week. We are within the two-week mark for the Peck-Chalko wedding.. and there is much to be done. I will try to be better about updating... but no promises!
Guten nacht, meine friends.
